tarntino:

i never want to get married and have kids i want to be 40 and a highly successful director and show up to my high school reunion dressed entirely in yves saint laurent with blood red lipstick and louboutin heels that could penetrate a man’s soft flesh in the current year’s bmw convertible and wear chanel sunglasses the entire time even while indoors so i don’t have to hold eye contact with the little people

(via gethinblake)

human:

"she sucked the cum out of me like go-gurt" - straight boy in the library 

(via crunchier)

i’m so afraid of marriage like what if you marry someone and like have kids with them and then they decide they don’t love you anymore or something idk man but that shit is scary

(via crymeamilkshake)

  • me looking at thing: yooooo
  • me looking at price: nooooo

pvnk-is-dad:

I crave intimacy but I get confused and uncomfortable when I’m shown even the slightest bit of attention or affection.

(Source: evolved-emo, via misscumnoodles)

phoenix-falls:

No sugardaddies. No sugar mamas. No sugarbabies. Full socialism in romantic relationships. There are only sugarcomrades.

(via nihilnovisubsole)

  • friend: says something that vaguely references song lyric
  • me: PERFORMS ENTIRE SONG

cuttlefishgarden:

thecube42:

YOU WOULDNT DOWNLOAD A DRAGON

If I could download a dragon all the cops in the world couldn’t stop me

(via livefromthebookfort)